OLIVER: after hearing newborn Jack explode in his diaper, "Mom! Jack has a butt!"
TAVIN: "Mom, could you make me some dumplings for a snack?"
OLIVER: giving Tavin a marshmallow peep, "Tavin loves chicks!"
OLIVER: yelling at me all morning, "vacuum up the chickens!"
ME to OLIVER: "do you love baby Jack?" OLIVER: " i love chips!"
TAVIN: after being told to go to his room for being whiney, "well, no one wants to be lonley on valentine's day!"
TAVIN: "jelly comes from jellyfish. there is no convincing me otherwise."
ME: "oliver, did you poop?" OLIVER: while watching tavin play wii, "no, it's mario's poop."
ME: "would you like waffles or pancakes?" TAVIN: starts tip toeing around. ME: looking at tavin like he is nuts. TAVIN: "you told me to watch out for walking pancakes!"
OLIVER: "mommy, i have a surprise for you! FIREPOWER!"
TAVIN: 'mom, how come no one ever salutes me?"
OLIVER: "i'm going to get bacon for a present! i don't want bacon."
TAVIN: "oliver, let's play catch. you have to take turns throwing up. it's your turn to try and throw up."
TAVIN: "don't worry mom, santa claus knows who stole your stuff from the studio."
BOYS: "can we use this as a tightrope, mom?"
TAVIN: "when is grandma going to start having babies?"
OLIVER: "i want to eat monkey arms." ME: "do you mean lucky charms?" OLIVER: "yeah, monkey charms."
TAVIN: "your reign of terror ends now, mom."
OLIVER: "i want to fly like a super-hero! please!" ME: " i can't make you fly, buddy." OLIVER: "no, just use your wand!"
OLIVER: "do i have a mustache? will you cut my mustache?"
ME: "oliver, it's time to make dinner!" OLIVER: "ok, you get the ghetti, and i'll get the pops and pants!"
Oh gosh. I’m really not ready for this.